According to Wii Fit… Mii Fat.

One day I was driving my yellow jeep down Great Highway chasing another yellow jeep…

Jake @ 6 months

Jake @ 17 months

Enjoying a sunny day at Taylor’s after work

With friends like B:Rad throwing back dozens of PBRs. In cans, no less.

Touk, Erica, Ryan, Ryan & Darius

the ONION MOVIE — Review/notes to follow…

View the trailer.

MOB. For life.

On the way to Thieve’s Tavern, we stumbled upon something so heinous we lost our buzz. A hefty bag and a Nordtrom shopping bag were found containing dozens of naked Cabbage Patch Kids on the Dubouce sidewalk just below Valencia. By the apparent Xavier Roberts signatures on the tushies of these victims, they were authentic CPKs, some of them still preemies. Even more shocking was finding a light blue Care Bare in the middle of it all.

Said a passer by…

Who would steal Cabbage Patch Kids clothes, then turn around and throw the babies out with the bathwater? It makes no sense to me whatsoever.

I KNOW!

Je parlais avec la cousine de Julz à Montréal au sujet de mon voyage. Ma partie préférée de la ville est la rue St. Catherine. Aux restaurants, je dirais à la serveuse, “Merci mon petit poulet.” Après qu’ils me frappent à ma tête avec le menu. Et je dirais le taxi driver me porter à la maison de Celine Dion maintenant. Vite. Rapidment. S’il te plais. 

Bubble Lounge  >  Kells  >  Chow  >  Pilsner

Don’t ask me how all of us managed to fit at that table for two…

Bubble Lounge - Pink champagne and oysters loosens up the tightest crowd. It also puts lead in your pencil.

Kells - The Irish Catholic in me always likes it.

Chow - Pork chops and polenta are good, but nothing beats talent in a Tattoo You t-shirt.

Pilsner - Throwing back Hoegaarden while playing pinball is a ridiculous way to end the most nervous night.

Flatline Transmissions rockit! Notes coming soon…

I pre-ordered SNUFF months ago and it finally arrived. SNUFF is the latest novel from my favorite freak writer CHUCK PALAHNIUK. Last year he relased RANT, which was disgusting. I just started reading SNUFF. So far it’s sick. It’s about porn star with a big vision and everything that revolves around the porn industry—which is basically everything. Unlike HAUNTED, which was 800 pages, SNUFF is under 200 pages of large print. I plan to review it when I’m done, which might be later tonight.

Until then, here’s a promo-preview from Double Day Publishing. Watch the video series starring Chuck himself interviewing the star of SNUFF – Cassie Wright.

MR. is a bar/barbershop in the SF FiDi. Not your typical barbershop like Russ’s in Mill Valley. MR. is a fancy bar with a full service hair salon in the back, shoeshine stands on the way to the toilets, and massage and nails upstairs. I could be wrong about upstairs—I never went up there. And in the main front room is a lounge with a two-tender bar that serves only beer, wine and champ. Nothing hard. Food? All I saw was white on rice.

Personally, after work I like stalking bartenders that will make a margarita in my mouth. And when I’m having my back shaved, I like my Jack and Coke. And for you ladies… while MR. will serve you at the bar, they will NOT do your hair. Boys rule only.

MR. = NOT DOIN’ IT.

FiDi=Financial District. Three years in SF, I’m just now learning the stupid lingo. DYL=Destroy Your Liver. Who yelps up this garbarge? Gimme a break.

Now on to JULZ. Julz is this groovy NB chick that knows her SOX. According to US Magazine, we never dated… we just “hooked-up” from time-to-time. I now know her as the party-photog that likes to frame three people in every click. 

JULZ = DOIN’ IT!

Let op de video’s van elk van Madonna

Zij zeggen de weg aan hel met goede bedoelingen bedekt is … Let op het gesprek RTL Blvd met Madonna

P.S. Happy Birthday, George Michael!

Snake Whiskey… it changed my life.

Nothing ventured nothing gained

Nite and day
Black beach sand to red clay
The US to UK, NYC to LA
From sidewalks to highways
See it’ll never be the same again
What I’m sayin’
My mind frame never changed
’til you came rearranged

(Lyrics lifted from Mel C and Lisa Lopes)

When I lived in losAngeles, I partied like a rockstar.

I found the gardens more exciting than the museum.

David Hockney turned hundreds of 4″x6″ into a single 4′x6′

Someday soon I will be ready to talk about what happened that night.

On his BIKE… and on the COVER of the San Francisco Examiner! (4/11)

Read the article

Can you guess who was “Safe-Sitter”-certified in 4th grade at the National Babysitter Academy?

Something’s different about MD… I think she’s disgusting!

Monday nights at 83 Proof are the best. Especially when Juan Jeremy shows up. He’s always cranking his manual video camera looking for the next big star. He’s ridiculous!

Kevin Love scored 6 of UCLA’s 11 points in the 2nd half—finishing the game with 19 points and 11 boards. Bruins rally in the final minute to beat Texas A&M. 

Mad’s birfday at SUNDAY’S ARE A DRAG — Harry Denton’s Starlight Room at the top of the Sir Francis Drake Hotel in SF’s Union Square… followed by some messy drinking at ZEITGEIST

I want my leather harness back!

Download RA DIOHEA_D RAINYDAYZ REMIXES

Nude(z)
Radiohead remix by AMP_LIVE ft. Too $hort & MC Zumbi
Video footage from the Radiohead film Scotch Mist

Radiohead & Apm_Live

The show was hella fun!

$ 10,000  !!

4 Months 3 Weeks 2 Days
During the course of one day in 1987 in Communist Romania, Otilia helps her friend and roommate Gabita to get a late-term abortion done (at that time, any sort of abortion, as well as any kind of contraceptive were illegal in Romania). The film is very realistic and shows the rough and gritty situation in which the girls, particularly Otilia, must make decisions and deal with their consequences. A very heavy film.

Ryan’s friends — Adam & Chris — All Strings & Joints
Live at Bazaar Cafe on California St

Support F U N K   M A S T E R  and  R O C K S F
(Real Options for City Kids)
Purchase event tickets or donate $$ to RockSF.org

The angry boy a bit too insane
- - - - -
I wish you would step back from that ledge my friend

The back wall of the elevators at the W in downtown SF are awesome! They’re floor-to-ceiling backlit HOLOGRAMS of the images above. These iPhone clicks do NOT do them justice.

It happened after the charity golf tournament. Lori and Emily hitched a ride back to the City with me. We crossed the Golden Gate Bridge and approach the toll plaza, but I wasn’t paying attention and ended up in a “FasTrak Only” lane—no toll collector, just a scanner looking for a FasTrak permit on my car. Oops. I zoomed through accepting the fact that several weeks later I can expect a hefty carpool violation ticket in the mail.A couple weeks later the dreaded FasTrack letter arrived. I didn’t want to know how much the fine was. I just wasn’t interested. To this date that piece of mail remains unopened. Several more weeks go by and another FasTrak envelope arrives with “Delinquent” in red ink staring at me. Did I open up this letter? Not right away. I let i t sit on my desk. Two more weeks pass—there are random notes and telpohone numbers covering both back and front of the envelope. Tonight I finally had the courage to open it up. Original fine = $40. (I was expecting something like $200+). Delinquent on top of the fine = $75. And there’s a final due date listed in bold letters, which coincidentally is TODAY!No time to be upset, I scan the letter for a URL hoping I can pay the fine online. It’s my lucky day.

• :: Bay Area FasTrak
• :: I type in the violation number and my license plate number
• :: I click on the first link and an image of my car pops up
• :: I read the instructions: Pay the fine or dispute it

Dispute is an option … Who knew? FasTrack-slackers can dispute violations online. So I write this slick draft (in Notepad), then I copy and paste it in the dispute box. I fail to see the “200 character limit” disclaimer, so my 1000+ character Aly McBeal-like argument gets truncated. I spend another hour trimming that sucker down to exactly 200 characters. This is what I submitted. Verbatim.

I seldom cross the GG Bridge, & I was not clear on Cash/FasTrak & FasTrak Only lanes. However, it was my understanding that a car w/3+ passengers is considered CARPOOL. There were 3 of us, so I thought I was OK passing through that lane. Thanks for your understanding.  

When we got to the toll gates,, it was 5 minutes before start of carpool hours. Cross your fingers…

2007 flew by so quickly—didn’t it? … Here to help us ROCKET! the new year is my God son JACOB in a tribute to his dad’s all-time favorite rock guitarist — Phil Collen from Def Leppard. (See photo of Alexis and Phil below)

Tomorrow (Jan 3rd) is a very special day. Big Jake will celbrate his 1st birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BOY!

(Phil & Alexis—Backstage)

When I got my first digital camera six or seven years ago, I took a long walk down Melrose Ave in Los Angeles and just clicked away. After downloading the 200+ images, I highlighted the ones that I liked. And within seconds I randomly arranged these images into 3 throws of 3. These 9 images, combined with their positions in this 3×3 grid, make up a story that I can tell over and over again.

Click each photo for more images… 

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